New glasses

I bought a fake geeky glasses in February when I went home. I knew it was going to be mine the moment I saw this blue frame sitting at the display. Getting  a blue and big geeky glasses has always been on my list, and thankfully my voice was heard!

I always have a thing for geeky glasses for several reasons- they make my eyes look bigger and they go well with many fashion styles. Moreover, I think my appearance is nerdy enough to match with my glasses perfectly.

Haha so the camwhoring session becomes more and more frequent ever since I bought the glasses. My co-worker said I look like Korean artist with make up and back to Chinese with no make up.  I take it as a compliment to my improved make up skills, which eases out my effort to switch between Korean and other Asian styles. Personally, I think I'm my dad's and my eldest sister's 饼印 instead of other people.

Kareshi also uses my glasses to amuse me by posing different looks, so funny but I don't think he'll let me post these pictures. Oh well, I have to say he is a boy full of charisma and I've yet to explore different sides of him.

Anyway, this Sunday is our 7-month anniversary and the boy is blasting full gear for his Statistic midterm revision.  :) No celebration but a truckload of wishes for you, happy 7-month and good luck on your midterm muah muah!

只要两个人的心没有时差，那距离就不是问题

今天刚看完一部电视剧，男主角说‘ 只要两个人的心没有时差，那距离就不是问题’。

我觉得很对，也很适合套用在我的情侣朋友身上。因为他们的坚持，让我看见了他们的努力，甜蜜，与幸福。

而我，用了两个情人节去明白，人无时无刻，只要活得开心，就是一种幸福。那是个人选择，与别人无关，所以不一定要等到别人把幸福送到你门前才会快乐。

今年情人节，依然一个人，但却不孤单，戒了坏习惯，学会了遗忘， 也学会了体谅。那是好不容易得到的一种心情，所以我更珍惜现在所拥有的一切。

感谢大家，因为那是我的福气，我知道。

Go natural!

My friend just commented on my before-and-after make up look, saying that I look very different on both sides.

She went on saying:' I thought it was a good thing because what's the point of making up without looking different or being much more pretty after that?'

I didn't take it as a humiliation although it upset me a little, it was more of a trying-to-prove-myself moment as I started browsing through my pictures to compare them myself. I really agree with her because drawing eyeliner and wearing colour contact lens do make a significant difference on my eyes; they glow up and beautify them. However, being a typical librain, I always seek for a balance between bare and cake face as I do not really want to mask myself with a completely different look after all the beautifying effects make up tools provide. It's ok to have a difference, but I just want to make sure that people could still recognize my true self behind all the gimmicks. To make that happen, I pay a lot of attention to my diet and skincare to ensure my skin looks clean,smooth, and radiant all the time, with or without make up. After all, inner beauty is still what I'm focusing on because I believe in the saying 'inner beauty will bring out outer beauty'.

I don't really mind showing bare face in front of the public. Indeed, I usually go to school with bare face because I'm just too lazy to include make up as part of my daily routine especially when I have 8a.m class! I just want to look more pretty on certain occasions because bare face makes me feel lacking, that is when I'll go for the make up. So yeah, this post is really for those who haven't seen my bare face before, and I thought, why not?

Yeap, it's always go natural most of the time and go pretty on the right occasion for me!

爱笑的傻瓜

很多人都不解我天生爱笑的本性，常会问我说： 你到底在笑什么？ 有什么好笑的事吗？

想起来，我还真的是常常都在笑，可以是在吃饭的半途，可以是在阅读的时候，也可以是在某个很突然的瞬间不期然地笑起来。很多时候，我都是在傻笑，因为我的脑里就好像装满了无限个大笑脸，充当着我笑容的补充器，所以微笑也不会有干枯的一天。也因为这一种态度，让我在别人面前哭不起来，只会本能的笑一笑，然后把烦恼都像折衣服般规律地收起来。真的，看过我哭的人应该觉得很骄傲才对，因为那绝对是我人生中异常珍贵的画面。

曾经有好几个人跟我说过，说他们想看看我发飙的样子，会不会是个微笑着骂人的傻瓜。也有人说，就是我这种人发起脾气来才最恐怖，十足百年才爆发的火山那么有杀伤力。说真的，我也不知道我发飙起来的样子会怎样，虽然会有生气的时候，可就算遇到再衰的事情，再贱的人，我就是提不起劲去骂人。虽然有时候还真的很想看看自己发飙的程度，可我就是那种很难被惹气的类型，真的生气起来就会对那事/人绝望的人，所以心中的那团火也不会待很久。这样对身体也好一点嘛，有效地扑火才能够看见值得自己高兴的事情啊！也许，那时我面对人生，面对世界仅有的态度，笑一笑，再继续努力就好。

话说什么时候，大家可以帮个忙，帮我把火气兼泪都挤出来，让我看看是怎么样的感觉嘛！我也蛮想知道在别人面前大骂个1分钟或是倒头大哭会是什么样的新奇感觉呢！

谢谢，我

只是习惯了在心灵很脆弱的时候，都会拍拍自己的肩膀，提醒自己努力走过来的路。

然后，感谢着眼下的这双脚，感谢着眼里的这个自己，感谢着还在等待自己的每一个明天。

这些日子里，认认真真地矛盾过，疯狂过，挫败过，然后又重新地振作过，开心过。

挫败并不好玩，但它却让我踏踏实实地学会做一个爱自己的人。

从此，我少了期待，多了踏实，少了憧憬，多了自信。

我也亲眼见证了那个连别人都不了解的自己，还有那份狠起来可以变得非常麻木的心。

即便如此，我还是很想对自己说，没关系，我还是很喜欢这样的自己。

也因为明白了昨天的艰辛与今天的得来不易，我希望我的明天不再活在过去，而是一切重新。

更因为明白了人生不存在重启键，所以每天都重新地祈祷，重新地过活，重新地努力，只盼望能够守住那个不放弃自己的内心，不曾喊累的坚持。

而此刻最想感谢的，正是这样的自己。辛苦你了，但请别忘了往后的坚持与耐心，因为我相信你可以。

Back with a stronger heart

Oh my, I finally have the time and mood to properly blog about my entire summer. I can’t believe how much I’ve done in my life while leaving the blog empty simultaneously, and I really mean it when I say ‘much’! Having visited 3 countries in a month, I’ve definitely had a taste of staying in different city every night and breaking my own record of taking the most number of flights in a month, to an extent which I felt the need to take a break from a break. However, I think I’ve also qualified myself as a helpful travel buddy from all the things I’ve learned in this traveling month. Also, it’s definitely the best time to know more about a person through the experience of  traveling together, and I can’t help but to emphasize the importance of finding good travel buddies for a truly good trip. 

This summer has got to be the most fulfilling and fruitful season in these three years, as I’ve brought myself closer to my dream while witnessing the accomplishment of some other peoples’ dreams. For the first time after a long while, I’m actually breathing in the joy of dreams coming true again, which is such a down-to-earth and fulfilling moment.

Being the last summer of my undergraduate years, I’ve given myself sufficient time to consider about my future to set things clear. Having to talk about myself with family and friends makes me feel like a grown up, but keeping them from everything they should know about me is not the way I love them, because they are such an important piece in my life. They complete me more than anyone else.

It's just the right time for confession this summer, and I'm glad that, I'm back with a stronger heart after everything.

激发潜能中

Credits to superb photographer Ai Vern.

曾经听过别人说，活得更自信美丽就是对伤害你的人最好的报复。

某程度来说，我觉得这种心态很正面，毕竟拥有精彩的人生最终得益的还是自己。与其说是报复，我觉得那是战胜自己心魔的一种表现，因为自己终于愿意放下包袱去发掘其他的可能性，只有在放下怨恨的同时，才是灿烂人生的开始。我相信每个人的体内都流淌着无限的可能性，只要专研下去就会有更大的爆发力。22岁的我，很庆幸地激发了自己一部分的潜能，正迈入人生的另一个阶段。当自己愿意去了解另外一面的自己的时候，那才是人生刚开始要绽放的时期，因为我愿意为了自己而相信自己的能力，心甘情愿的，毫不犹豫的踏上新的旅途。

我并不是一个很容易被刺激到的人，可是当我真正被激发的时候，我内心所散发出来的爆发力一定不小。那是因为我会不断地磨练自己，一直到我表现得比我想象中还要好为止。只要我还抱着这份自信的一天，我就会不惧艰辛地努力下去，那是我对人生的一种态度---先准备好自己来迎接世界。与其说这是怕输，我更害怕令自己失望，活在自怜的状态中，因为我人生最不缺的就是同情。如果有一天，我成功了，我也不会因此而贬低那些曾经伤害我的人，因为比起对他们的揶揄，我更喜欢用表现来证明自己，沉浸在那种无声胜有声的感觉。那些人无需得到我的原谅，也无需做出任何的弥补，因为在他们伤害我的同时就早已选择性地忽略我的感受。既然选择了不在乎，那也无需执着于自己的道歉能否换得到别人的体谅。往好的一方面想，他们的存在造就了一个更坚强与自信的我，而我也只需要专心地走接下来的路就好。只要我在得到别人的认同之前，先达到了自己的要求，那就是对我最重要的事。

最近的我，终于再次提笔创作，尝试从不同曲风的歌曲中摄入更多的灵感。说起音乐创作，我在12岁的时候就开始写了自己的第一本歌词本，当时我把很多想法都写在里头，名副其实地让它成为了一本有词没曲的音乐册。一直到18岁，在我心情最糟到透顶的时候，就涌出了生平的第一首曲，只为了一个人。只是当时的我，没能相信自己的创作能力，所以也没有继续坚持地发挥更多潜在的音乐本能。21岁那年，我又开始了词曲创作，把自己最深处的感受都零零散散地写下来，让它们承载着我当时的回忆。22岁的我，只希望能找回当年12岁的自己，单纯地因为喜欢音乐而记录下我专属的音乐旅程。我希望，就算在没有外来刺激的情况下，我还是能够善用自己的灵感来谱出一首又一首的作品。从某个角度来说，这对我也是崭新的开始，没有任何顾虑的，只为了自己热诚而存在的潜能。

断断续续地走了10年才决定再重拾的兴趣，现在再努力下去应该也不迟吧！

嗯，有心就不会有迟到的一天

大家别担心，我很好，我很好，我很好！

1. 最近别人赞我皮肤有变滑了，也许是我坚持每周做面膜和尽量早睡的效果吧。皮肤还是要从内到外的深层调理会比较有效，再加上每日三大笑，真的会见效喔，而且微笑是最好的化妆品，所以大家也不妨试试看吧！

2. 最近胃口有变好，虽然偶尔还是会泻个两三天，但比起之前还真的算是有很大的进步了。目前还是会每天吃药，体重还是43公斤，但我会继续加油增回上去的。 虽然会常被人拉起衣角嫌我手腕像骨头，也常被人猛抓手臂测量细度，更常被亏说‘我以为你快升仙了，都不会觉得饿”，但“记得要吃饭”绝对是我发病之后听到最多的关心，还真的很感谢大家的温馨小提示，我会继续努力吃饭去的!

3. 最近听到某人赞赏说‘Michelle变正了，刘海真的很适合你’！我觉得自己很幸运，因为我既没有明星耀眼的脸庞，也没有很多女生憧憬的双眼皮+瓜子脸+樱桃嘴，所以每次得到别人的赞赏的时候还真的觉得他们都太善良了，竟然愿意哄我一下小赞美一番。一直以来，我都秉持着一个信念，那就是我不需要是最漂亮的那个，但只要别人不觉得丑就好了。谢谢大家的善解人意啦，让我这小小的世界充满了许多的人间温情。

4. 最近课业很繁忙，虽然有时候会睡的比较少，但事实证明了努力是不会被白费的，所以我绝不会轻言放弃自己。3rd year绝对是我去图书馆最多的一年，以前我一想到图书馆就觉得人很多，宁可回家复习，但现在都会善用空档的时间跟朋友讨论功课，或是自己复习一下。我相信那是好的现象，所以也希望好成绩能一直延续下去啦！


5. 最近音乐灵感很多，很多旋律常在我脑海中闪过，只可惜我没能好好抓住每一次的机会，立即冲到钢琴前谱曲，不然我相信我早已作好几首作品了。说起钢琴，我也有好几个月没去练习了，每次看到自己僵硬的手指就感到沮丧，希望能利用这次的短假好好恶补一下，要不然10几年功夫很快就会化为乌有了。

6. 情人节快到了，有些朋友问我送礼的意见，我个人觉得情人节是花心思而不是砸大钱的日子，所以只要早点准备的话，就算是小小的东西也有可能会变成最大的惊喜滴。大家可以多花点时间回想一下对方说过的话+兴趣，我相信只要继续往这方向前进的话就一定能想到适合对方的礼物。大家加油，如果真不行的话可以再找我讨论讨论，两个人想总比一个人快嘛！今年我决定要实践一个不错的主意，真希望会成功，我相信自己也会很享受准备的过程。别人开心之余，我自己也很开心，何乐而不为呢？

7. 最近有一位好友深受感情困扰，陷入进退两难的局面。虽然对你们最后的结局感到可惜，但我想那一定是你们挣扎很久之后的决定吧，既然是对目前的你们最好的选择，我也深深祝福你们能够坚持地走下去。路是自己创造出来的，只要有足够的喜欢，也有足够的珍惜，就一定能走下去。记得我跟你说过吗? 只要够喜欢，就不会有解决不了的事情，属于你的，经过一番努力后也会回到你的身边；不属于你的，再勉强下去也只是伤害自己而已。真心希望这位朋友能够找到自己真正的幸福，记得要相信自己的选择，加油！

Be selfish for your own good

I had an in-depth conversation with my old friend a few days earlier, so deep that I thought I saw the shadow of myself when I was once put in the same shoes. I saw the previous self who was confronting the same dilemma, with the same options, and the choice fell on the question to weather prioritize myself first or the other person first.

She asked me : What should I do?

I paused for a while, that wasn’t a question out of my mind, I could have given her a rational answer if I was the same old me a few years back. But time can be a nasty thing sometimes, it changes a lot of things and retards my emotions, to the extent when I lost faith on things which were once perforable to my soul.

If possible, I wouldn’t want to see my best friend going through what I had gone through earlier and feeling the same uneasiness and despair in life. It was tough, I harmed myself too much and tore myself apart during the recovery.Now that I’m recovered, I’m really reluctant to see the repeat on another person, especially when it happens to the people that I care for life. Even if it’s meant to be selfish to the other people, I’m hoping that she can decide the best for herself, just for once, be selfish for your own good.

Then I smiled, I seemed to understand my past better after witnessing the same experience being put in another person’s life. I really wished I had a friend who gave me the push at the time, just like what I did to her. Making a start is not always the hardest thing to do, it’s the preparation you have to make in ending something that makes it painful.

Please, take my luck and blessing with you, for your blissfulness is a sweet serendipity of mine.I'm with you, my friend.

一半

[因为我并不需要依靠我的过去或财富而活着。我只关心现在。如果你能活在当下这一刻，你就会活得很快乐。生命对你来说将会是一场飨宴，一个盛大的庆典，因为生命就在我们活着的每一个当下。]Paulo Coelho, “El Alquimista”

这是我最近临睡前都会看的书，我喜欢每晚都只看一点，细嚼它每一字每一句的涵义，因为当中有很多道理并不是能在区区的一个晚上就能被了解的事。也许只是临睡前15分钟的阅读时间，但却让我得到无限心灵上的扶持。

走过这几年，我常觉得自己只剩下一半，充裕的部分变得更充裕，掏空的部分也持续被掏空。它不会有真正被填满的一天，但也不会一直都待在原点，它就一直盘绕在增加与减少中，维持着那平衡点。这种感觉并不坏，因为只有当我怀着一半的心情站在观景台上，才能够看到真正需要学会的另一半。每一次的成功都是一种收获，它带我跨越一半的区域，扩展原有的风景；但每一次的失败也不会将我击退回零点，它只是带我回到一半的山腰，告诉我要再从那里开始努力地越过山顶。这样的我，不害怕接受批评，因为我还有一半进步的空间；不害怕失去，因为自己还拥有着一半；真心接受美好，去继续增加我原有的一半；领悟人生的不美满，那是人生一半的定律。

也许是因为这样，遇到不顺心的时候，我常回想起已拥有的一半人事物，然后对自己说：
‘没关系，其实我已经拥有了一半！’

最后，要感谢传授我看书治疗法的黑色小天使！你无私的陪伴就是我生活中美好的一半。

力量

一直都不喜欢觉得自己可怜，当我还有帮助别人的能力，

一直都习惯收起坏脾气，生气别人让我难以原谅自己，

一直都在坦然地面对真相，真相是带我走向明天的伯乐，

一直都不相信永远，当我还活在会老化的躯体，

一直都勇于面对选择，选择让我相信自己的决定，

一直都勇于承担悲伤，悲伤会幻化为成长的泪滴，

一直都习惯接受决定，没有比接受更难熬的关口，

一直都习惯为别人着想，忘了自己也很重要，

如果有一天，我觉得自己可怜，自暴自弃，活在过去, 害怕清醒，身心疲惫，忘记微笑，

如果有那么的一天，请掴醒我，然后拍拍我的肩膀，
告诉我：没关系，最难熬的都已经过去了，你现在还好好地活着。

我相信，我会一直记得那一巴的力量，然后很积极地生活，为了自己。

我相信，我不会再输给自己，屈服于现实的幻影。

2010 is the year (12)

2010 is the year, I truly feel satisfied with my current life.

Achieving a balance in life is like hitting another milestone in life, it will only go for the better, not worse. I've always wanted to be grateful for every single day that I’m blessed with, every second spent with my family, every opportunity to witness the growth of my niece and nephews, every learning opportunity in Vancouver, as well as the yearly summer vacations with BFFs. I hoped I could truly feel the gratitude of waking up every morning and inhaling the gratitude for being alive. Because staying alive is a God’s gift, not merely a personal choice.

I spent months and months of self-discovery to accomplish this stage in my life, I worked very hard to improve the quality of my life psychologically. I read, travel, mingle with various friends, learn new languages, earn and save money, date, and everything else I could do in making my life exuberant. What I needed was just a kick to start-off these things and keep up with my motivation, and I’m glad that I found it this year. To me, no one deserves to be in the worst state of life, but one thing we need to accept about life is that life quality will only come after a significant amount of self effort. One must learn to rescue himself and accept the truth from every fall, if one doesn't find the rope to climb out of the hole, he can only be trapped forever.

At this moment of life, I truly understand the meaning of giving and taking, and I don’t force myself to forget about those stressful events but I allow time to wash them away. I’ve also learned to accept the beautiful imperfections which complement the cycle of my life, that it’s normal if things don’t go your way sometimes, just deal with them and move on to the next stage.I understand the consequences of every move I make, so much that the realm of my life involves a lot of decisions making. If I don’t let go some, I won’t gain more from the other aspects. Like my sis says, I too, began to see the half-filled glass instead of focusing on the other half which was empty. I thank God for all the angels sent to me and most importantly, the angel that lies in me all the time, to help me through when I felt completely miserable in my life. I thank myself for slapping myself for reality, to remind myself that it’s time to wake up for another new start of the day. Without the support and self-perseverance, I had no idea where in the jungle would I be in, for now.

2010 is a fruitful year to me. Thank God, thanks to everyone, thanks to myself, I felt loved and there I persevered.

2010 is the year (1)

2010 is the year I watched the first basketball match in my life.

I was reminded on the only basketball match I participated in my life during elementary school, and I can never forget the adrenaline rush which gushed through my bloodstream for the entire match. Although the match brought me a trophy,what matters the most to me was the 5 seconds of instant self-realization while watching the trophy. I had a better grasp about myself, that I am never a good rival if I were to be compared to somebody else.

My life is never a competition with anybody, but a series of magnificent self-accomplishments until I reach the final destination on earth- death.

Oh la la my colourful life

I’m a colourful person, I enjoy using cute little things because they turn my life into a colourful one. My obsession in colourful things has long been in me since I’ve loved decorating my room with pretty cute things since young. I love exploring creative ideas and art crafting, which is why I do window shopping myself sometimes just to look out for those cute things to satisfy my sight. If there were so many great minds in this world, then there should be abundant different ideas out there as well.

Colourful things simply make my day.



I’ve received quite a bit of positive feedbacks on my fringe and I really thank you guys for being so humble to me. Some friends encourage me to join freelance modelling while the others have asked me to model for them but I hesitate a lot since I can’t pose naturally in front of people, I realized I only work best with myself and my camera. Although curiosity of trying something new strikes me for a while, I still find it difficult to overcome the stage fright as I'm not used to presenting the best of myself in front of everyone else yet.It’s just like my singing as well, nobody knows this side of me until they have been along with me for a while, as I usually present my best to my BFFs.

Also because of the fringe, almost 60% of my friends claim that I’ve Korean look while the other 40% think that I’m more to Japanese. It changes my life slightly when a friend starts texting me in simple Japanese and he even wrote my birthday card in Japanese. I’m so glad that I can ‘pretend’ a bit since I’m able to understand most of the conversations besides being excited for the fact that I can finally put my Jap into use. Therefore, I should really go further for my Jap course before I start to age =_=, or I should say, before my memory starts to worsen.

Besides saving money, I’ve also started picking up some Korean language in preparation for my upcoming Korea trip with my lovely Seoulmates. I’m really putting an effort to learn both languages by watching tonnes of J&K dramas, sometimes I even re-watch the scene for a few times just to catch a word or phrase.

Anyway I like my fringe too although it means more work (have to cut my fringe almost every week now).I’m still coping well with this lifestyle,however the day I get bored of cutting my fringe will be the day I surprise you with my ‘10 seconds haircut’ again.

Happy 21st!

看着蛋糕上插上的21蜡烛，才真正感受到自己已是21岁大人的那份真实感。仔细回想起2010的点点滴滴，不难发现2010对我来说，是很艰辛的一年。今年走遍了每个人生中的低潮，每一波的难关都好像再重复地告诉着我，这，也许就是生活的意义。

在人际关系上，我开始变得更宽容，我选择把有杀伤力的事情都通通忘掉，只求别人给我一些歇息的空间。遇到不想见到的人，我学会了已微笑带过一切，也已微笑结束一切。人若要变得更圆滑，就必须不断地挑战自己的忍耐力才能够把无关紧要的话都不放在心上，只有真正的不在乎，才会刀枪不入。人若要变得更坚强，就必须经历更多才能够锻炼出那粒坚固无比的内丹。



在亲情与友情的经营上，我学会了付出与行动。一直以来，我都很珍惜与家人与BFF的点点滴滴，因为他们就是我内心真正的归属。今年暑假的所有时间都几乎跟他们一起过的，无论是与小侄女侄子的卡通时间，一家人的聚餐，帮狗狗洗澡抓狗骚，BFF的饮茶聚会与旅行，我都很珍惜，因为知道美好的光阴虽美好但也很短暂，所以一直都很珍惜。

幸福是属于懂得包容与付出的人，所以拥有了就必须要双倍地付出，才能够得到持之以恒的幸福。每个人都需要别人的关心，哪怕只是简单的一句谢谢，对不起，好好照顾自己，这些细小的关怀都会无形间拉近彼此的关系，所以绝对不要因为事小而不为。我重新评价了与一些朋友之间的友情，开始把他们归类在生命中不同的区域里，也开始把时间都花在不同的朋友身上，希望能借此扩展自己的视野。对于真挚的友情，我多了一份熟悉，学会更踏实地对自己在乎的人付出更多，并珍惜每一次的美好。对于那些说不上很珍贵的友情，我少了一份期待，就让它们静静地摆放在原地就好。



在学业上，我花了很多时间去尽最大的努力，只希望我的付出能得到好的回报。我开始了解，任何事情都会随着时间而改变，但学业却是能以努力换取的保障，能以努力增加知识的版图，所以我开始为将来做好准备，好好地充实自己。今年，我也花了很多时间用心地经营自己，并努力地达到自己心目中的要求。我相信自我经营才是最聪明的投资，因为只有真正了解自己的需要与兴趣才能更明确地去追求自己的目标。

至于感情，一直都是我内心最弱的一块。今年狠狠地在感情世界里摔了一跤，勉强自己去接受那些难以置信的事实。我不知道该怎么去定义自己的爱情观，也不知该怎么诉说自己的经历，我只是觉得，感情一直都不是单凭付出与等待就能够开花结果的事情。曾经有一段日子，我每天都望着大海，看着日落，对于可以不可以，该与不该做的事情挣扎了很久。默默承受了很久，到最后才发现自己还真的是傻的彻底，因为自己一直都只是他的第二顺位，所以就连生气的资格也没有。我只是让自己有所期待，让自己觉得暧昧是希望，错觉是机会。当时真的觉得自己很卑微，卑微地忽略了可以令自己更开心的生活，卑微地委屈就全，却又无法捍卫自己的感情。我不再勉强自己继续待在他世界的边缘，所以我选择祝福，也选择离开，因为这是我唯一能给的宽容。感情，对我来说，永远都会是一个难题，也许有一天，我会鼓起勇气再去解开这难题。



自己的难题,自己解决,
自己的心情,自己整理,
自己的疼痛,自己埋葬

我能做的，就是咬着牙自己对自己说,坚持下去。

今年是我第一次在温哥华真正庆祝生日，真心感受到了身边每一位朋友的祝福。有时候，我觉得每一次的机会都得来不易，有些人会是过客，有些人会是普通朋友，有些人会永远留在你身边，只是无论结果是如何，我依然觉得，我是幸福的孩子。

今年最大的收获，就是我把一个全新的自己送给了自己。希望这一个不断蜕变的自己能够一直坚持下去，享受每一份美好，熬过每一个难关。

今年生日唯一的愿望是为爸而许的，希望他能赶快好起来。

其他的，都显得不重要了。

10 things which make me smile ^_^

My breakfast fruity loops smiles at me.


Spent an awesome evening with bestie and watched a beautiful sunset together.


Two beautiful flowers fell on us on our way to the beach.


Jia Huey asked me to stop studying and go back home to play with her, followed by Eu Kenn telling me that he is a good boy on the phone.


Following the direction my Mickey and Minnie are looking at.


Finally received the birthday card I should have gotten a year ago.


A pretty photo with the BFFs.


Seeing colourful things being put together.


Reminiscing on my homestay experience in Japan.


Listening to inspiring songs by my favourite Japanese band. Two of the members in the group are Canadians and they’re brothers.

I realized there’s no use in crying and it is always better to smile than to cry when something happens, so we shall direct our energy into making our lives better to no let everyone beside us worry. There’s also one thing I learn when I’m studying abroad, which is you have to keep yourself in the best condition whenever possible, and cheer yourself up immediately after a fall regardless what method you’re using. The point is, you have to get up soon, because there are still never-ending tasks waiting for you, because the world doesn’t revolve just for you, because there’s no point crying on the same matter over and over again without helping the situation. So, after wiping all the tears, I should start doing anything I can to make a difference.

Firstly, I should start with self-reflection and filter all the negativity in me.

跟自己说声对不起，因为很久没有好好的吃饭
跟自己说声对不起，因为我让自己不开心
跟自己说声对不起，因为悲伤麻烦了一些爱我的人
跟自己说声对不起，因为忘了提醒自己要好好照顾自己
最后，说完对不起之后，生活还在继续

After self-reflection, I will continue finding motivation from everything, there are so many things I really feel like doing now and I’ll find no accuse to procrastinate these things any further. Everyday will be a beautiful day to start with if I see things beautifully.

It’s a beautiful world, 宇宙に旅に出よう

On diet

I’m on diet for almost a month now and managed to shred off a few KGs of fats all ‘imported’ from Vancouver. But I’m not like those celebrities, I don’t carry out dietary plan which would drive me crazy due to food crave. I just reduced my food portion while going to gym regularly.

You know, one thing I like about myself is that I will work on something once I find the need to do so, regardless of what other people say. I noticed a lot of people are being dishonest when commenting on someone’s weight, that’s why going on diet is a thing you have to self-realize it and then do something about it. To me, it’s either you tell the truth to thrill me to go on diet, or you don’t talk anything about it to make me not realize it, be it in front of me or behind me.

Oh yay, so this is what I’ve been doing for now:
1. Meal-to-meal time is 4-5 hours and try not to have snacks in between.
2. Reduced meal portion and eat until I’m 70% full.
3. Work on treadmill for an hour three times a week.


Basically it’s just an ‘eat less exercise more’ plan since I’m not fully banning myself from any food, I just reduced the amount of consumption. The good news is, I’m just 2 kgs away from my target only, and I’ll definitely continue to work hard on it.

つっと頑張ります

This is the real target I’m talking about!!

Nicknames

Better Together-Jack Johnson

I noticed a lot of my friends like to add ‘baby’ behind my name. They prefer calling me mich ‘babi’ or ‘ babe’ or simply just ‘bb’ to make it sound sweeter. At first there was just one friend who called me baby, and then more and more friends joined the line. To me, I don’t mind people calling me any nicknames at all so long that they are sweet and nice. It’s just that different bunch of friends call me by different nicknames, that's why my nicknames are various and ranged widely, from animals to cartoons to some weird ideas which pop out from the nowhereland.

Here are some examples:

1. 蚂蚁
2. 呆mun仔
3. Minnie mouse
4. Mich babi
5. Darmun
6. Munx2
7. Bzz Mun
8. Ah Pui
9. Ah B chan
10. Lao Po
11. Bossi

Somehow these nicknames make me feel good because they all have different interesting stories behind them. Also, they remind me of different persons and bring up different memories. That’s why I tell you, it’ll be so difficult for you guys to come up with a new nickname for me, because I already have a list of names and I don’t know what else can I be called.

SERIOUSLY, WHAT ELSE CAN I BE CALLED?

Over the hurdle

Despite of the declaration of my 4th exam war in UBC, my life has been fantastic so far. One reason I can think of is because I’ve stroke a balance between mugging time and fun time and I know I’m catching up with my own pace. Coming to the 4th term in university, I’ve known more than enough on the only way for me to survive in uni- make me happy so that I can study harder. I gain motivation from motivating sources, like my buddies’ happiness. There are so many juicy stories (mostly exciting)from them this term which keep me alive and persevere till the end with their blessings.

Term 2 is like a mountain to me, I’m just at the hill climbing towards the top. I believe that everything is worth a sacrifice; therefore I’ve to bear with the patience and energy consumption in order to enjoy the panoramic view from the top. I like the feeling of conquering my fear and obtaining the key towards my life.I’m still on my way with a slight improvement but infinite determination within myself, but one thing I never stop believing in myself is that I won’t give up on myself so easily despite of anyone.I may tumble and fall but I will surely walk myself to the top one day.

This term is also about knitting friendships and eliminating unnecessary qualms to me. Dealing with human relationships was my biggest task apart from studying this term. I’ve just brought myself closer to some friends and letting myself all out for them, while eliminating some and being distant with them. Good thing is that I’ve finally found an intimate friend here who cares for my everything and makes me feel comfortable revealing myself to her. Finally, I’ve some sense of belonging here.

Speaking about eliminating unnecessary qualms, I just went over the hurdle and rebound again. I’ve done all the things needed to be done and I just have no reason to stay anymore. I’ve no intention to stay either, I think I deserve a better person, better life and better treatment. There won’t be any regrets because I gave myself a chance, and that’s it, failure or success, that’s just the end of it and I'm simply not bothered by it anymore.

^.^ As for now, I’m just anticipating for my rejuvenated life with more new faces showing up.

Results

Are results important in your life?

I used to think that having a good result in everything I do is the only indicator to the success in my life. But now, I've a new perspective on the successes in my life.

Process is important to me nowadays, I’m taught in a way that if I learnt something along the way towards a goal, then it’s not considered a failure even if I failed to accomplish the goal in the end. It’s not that results are no longer vital to me anymore, but it’s no longer the sole indicator which determines my success.

I don’t think I’ve lost something completely even if I did not get the desired outcome in the end. The further I walk along the route, the more I understand about myself and the things that I’ve gained. I just forgo the desired outcome for something else, so it’s the price I’m willing to pay for it.

If I’m willing to pay for the lesson, then it’s no longer a loss anymore.
只要我学会笑着走到最后，那就是一种胜利。

On a side note,today is 16th April:
• I’ll stop procrastinating and work hard for Physics final on the 20th.
• I had Barbecue in Japanese style with my buddies at Zakkushi .*thumbs up*
• Wayne just got me an Olympic Coke Zero bottle. ^.^
*I really agree with Isis that Wayne you’re the best, wa wa wa wa!*
• I told myself that I’m good for 3 times.
• I found a guy who has the same birthday as me,woot!



Looks like today is another great day of mine.