Sometimes, I'm happy to be busy.

4 assignments+1 research+1 discussion+ 1 field trip done in a week, I feel so accomplished after last week although that requires more time commitment with my studies. Last week was tiring but at least productive I would say. Thank god I spent the last day of the week singing my heart out as loud as I wanted.

Someone asks me a lot of questions about the personality of a librain recently. Frankly, that’s not my expertise because I barely study horoscopes. I tend to believe that an individual’s personality is based more on the psychological, environmental and genetic factors. I prefer analyzing things based on a specific situation than bringing in the horoscope factor in classifying a person. Having said that,that has got to be one of the most interesting stories I’ve heard this year and I really enjoy being a part of the listener and a secret keeper because I learn from every story of the others.

Beeday is coming soon and my fellow friends are even more excited in celebrating it than I do. I still have no idea on my celebration because the fact that I’m turning an adult soon still surprises me a lot. I can’t believe that it’ll be my third birthday here, and I think this year will be a better one with more close friends around me, so awesome that the celebration will end up being like a fun gathering instead.

Anyway, I kinda had a nasty encounter for the past few days and I shall update you guys about it soon!

Pledge today, make a change.

"We are not put on this earth for ourselves, but are placed here for each other. If you are always there for the others, then in time of need, someone will be there for you."

I’m glad that I’ve met that someone, someone whom I can get along well and talk comfortably, someone whom I’ll bother showing my concern and letting them know and feel that, someone whom I’m willing to spend more time going out with and hoping to understand more about them. I think, that’s an improvement of me because I used to keep my feelings in heart most of the time but now, I’ll deliver my message at the appropriate time, to the appropriate person.

Although my weekdays are all about lectures and assignments now, I feel like I’m really living a life as a student with school on weekdays and friends time on weekends as I’m keeping the balance quite good. More calls, more texts, more consistent study and assignment buddies during break time, more outings and more exposures, these things make me feel so lively nowadays. I’m totally giving myself a chance to go on a roller coaster ride and trying out another kind of lifestyle as well as studying method to see if it'll bring out some potential in me.

Anyway, I’ve also joined El’s cause of ‘Vegosaurs for change’. It’s a cause about reducing meat consumption for a better environment. So I’m banning myself from meat once a week and I feel good about it because it’s something related to my field of study as well, it’s something about food sustainability and how we should understand the impacts of our food choice on the environment and the entire food system. Nowadays, I begin to think about my contributions towards the society, how an act of care and kindness can bring some new hope to a system. Do not neglect a mere personal contribution because aggregation can become very influential, just like the ‘Earth hour’ and some other thought-provoking events. They don’t make you change for just one day, all they pledge for is a lifetime commitment from you through the event.

Do join me if you’re willing to make the commitment and here’s the event page on FB. 100 people have joined the line and I really hope to see more of you guys there, standing in the same line for the same goal.

http://www.facebook.com/event.php?eid=162399673773871#/event.php?eid=103301333063820

I don’t know what exactly is changing within me but something is changing, probably it’s an adoption of a better mind with healthier thoughts. I think I’m heading to the positive direction in every perspective, be it personal contributions and goals, family and friendships, and lastly relationship.

I’m good, I’m content, and I just want to keep this gratitude flowing.

September

I’m going through a new phase since school started. The same old bunch of friends, a few familiar housemates, yet I’m visualizing everything in a new way. Despite of all the familiar things, I also see how the surrounding is changing from time to time, I see how UBC claims itself as the place of mind and making some efforts to reach there. Looking at the class condition and increasing class size, I think what I saw was an ant hole, small yet abundant. How to squeeze in and out from there? Walk faster, work faster and then leave faster.

Also, I noticed I haven’t been doing a lot in Vancouver since I came here. It was just a shame for an outsider to encourage me to go to UBC anthropology museum when I myself have been living on campus for the past two years.

>.< Bahh anthropology museum I’ll surely make my way there this year!!!

Good thing is, I’ve found my desired lifestyle after 2 years+. I’m getting to know myself better and better and the life I desire.I like the way I am for now and I truly enjoy life with my current friends, embracing all the fun times while stepping foot on new paths.

After all I’m still me, I don’t tolerate and put effort in something anymore when I think I’ve done my best to understand a person and have had enough of it. I’m still me, I’d like to share my life with some other people who treasure the same opportunity as I do. I’m still me, I love freedom and a simple life which satisfies not only myself, but also the people around me.

And it’s good to know that, I’m still me and I’m back to myself again.

'Nothing to lose but everything to gain
Reflecting now how things could’ve been
It was worth it in the end.'

September-Chris Daughtry

A bad start

This has got to be the worst start of my academic year.

I never understand the pain of eating disorder until recently when I can’t even have a proper meal as my tummy feels bloated and gassy after consuming a little bit of food. Literally, I’m excreting 80% of what’s going into my stomach everyday in a bad form. To make matter worse, I’m still not fully recovering from jet lagging yet and so I’m kind of sleep deprived for the whole week. I finally understand the pain of not being able to eat rice, noodles or any starchy food at all which used to taste so delicious to me.

I don’t know what’s happening to me as I thought it would be pretty easy for me to cope with jet lagging after spending 2 years here.I really dislike my current lifestyle and I’m doing everything I can to regain the balance in both my sleeping time and diet. I can’t afford to see how these important elements in life taking their tolls on my studies later on.

I just want to be myself again, a person who feels satisfied after finishing a meal and getting enough sleep. Eating disorder has never ever happened to me before and therefore I’ve no clue on how to solve it.

Help me and give me some suggestions please!

我已经把你戒掉

I’ve been following up with S.H.E’s music since their first album, and therefore have I witnessed the improvement in their vocals besides the variety of songs they’ve tried out so far. Hebe is my favourite singer among S.H.E, and I feel glad to see her solo album since I think her talent should be acknowledged by more people instead of just being a member in the pop girlband.

S.H.E reminds me a lot of my youthful memories, since many of their songs relate me to Win and El along with our secondary schooldays. Their songs have been accompanying me through ups and downs, and they are the only group which I’ve their full CD collection.

還是原來那個我 不過流掉幾公升淚所以變瘦
對著鏡子我承諾 遲早我會換這張臉一堆笑容

不算什麼 愛錯就愛錯
早點認錯 早一點解脫

我寂寞寂寞就好
這時候誰都別來安慰 擁抱
就讓我一個人去痛到受不了
想到 快瘋掉 死不了就還好

我寂寞寂寞就好
你真的不用來我回憶裡 微笑
我就不相信我會笨到 忘不了
賴著 不放掉 人本來就寂寞的
借來的都該還掉
我總會把你戒掉

還是原來那個你 是我自己做夢你有改變什麼
再多的愛也沒用 每個人有每個人的業障因果
會有什麼 什麼都沒有 早點看破 才看的見以後

我寂寞寂寞就好
這時候誰都別來安慰 擁抱
就讓我一個人去痛到受不了
想到 快瘋掉 死不了就還好

我寂寞寂寞就好
你真的不用來我回憶裡 微笑
我就不相信我會笨到 忘不了
賴著 不放掉 人本來就寂寞的
我總會把你戒掉

They say, we need some experiences to grow up, so I’m taking every experience as a lesson to broaden my sight and a challenge to control my temper. As long as we’re willing to stand up again, there’s always a chance for us to live an exuberant life.
One of my besties and I both went through similar experiences few months ago, and I told her that if 2 depressive people stick together and continue whining about the past, they will only become more depressed. Therefore,one of them must wake up earlier and cheer another one up, then only can we add 2 more optimistic people on earth. If I can do it, I believe everyone else can, that's why don't give up yourself under any circumstances.

My past experience was a total failure and a pain but if I could use it as a guidance to someone else's life, why not share it? I've found myself, my goal and faith along the way, have you?