May 28, 2009

Don't worry about me because I love my life.

After meeting up with most of my friends,I think, my friends are really worried about my love life.

这就是所谓的'皇帝不急太监急'.

I thought my post on 'love youself more' pretty much explains my current perception on relationships. But friends are even more worried after reading it.

You know what they do? They start observing the guys around me and telling me which one to be considered.They've also taught me the ways to get a good guy back in Canada.

They're feeding me with a lot of good words to boost my confidence. To me,it's no longer a matter of confidence, it's the willingness to step into it. Overall,most of the guys are getting worse and worse, so far I've seen, not about appearance, not about personality, but some of them don't treat relationship like a thing, because ' it's not like I'm going to marry with her' and ' I'm still young, it's ok even if I break up with her'. I'm overdosed on all these thoughts that they no longer sound wrong to me.In fact, these are not wrong but my thought mismatches them. So, some people in the game behave flirtatiously, with or without a partner, that I sometimes will start wondering, why do they need one if they always change ? I have no right at all to influence their attitudes, so I manipulate mine by avoiding the participation.

Some people are looking for one desperately, they feel extremely discontented with their lives without a boyfriend. Now I don't get this idea, why can't you live a good life without a boyfriend? Is your life attached to him that you can't find a life for yourself? And then they start saying things like ' Pui Mun, I hope I can be as tough as you, living happily even when you're alone at overseas.' I can assure you that you can be happy regardless of the place, it's the mental condition that is important.

I'm not saying having a boyfriend is disastrous and meant hurt and lies only, but I'm not ready for a commitment, there's no one that I think worth my commitment at the moment. Also, I can't take the stress and depression after a fight or conflict.To me,it's never a poor thing to not have a boyfriend to treasure me,and it's never bad to stay single. Everything needs a cost, and I'm paying it of course. I don't date on Valentines, receive flowers at my doorstep, but I get more free time to do my own things.

I think you make the choice of staying happy or venture into the love world that makes people blind easily. I mean, you can't mourn for the same tragedy that has happened to you forever, you need to carry on with your life no matter how, and if that's so, why not find a good way to continue it? Why must you be so stubborn over someone who doesn't love you that much and waste your time?When the time comes, the right one will come to you. If not, you still have to get a life, right?

Your life never abandones you, although he does.

So buddies, don't worry too much about me. You know I won't cry because of not having a boyfriend and I don't find one desperately.But if you are still worried, then pray for me to meet a good one in Canada, be it an Angmoh, Korean, Japanese or Taiwanese. With or without one, I'm still satisfied with my life, accomplishment and myself.

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