Good life starts with positive mindset

I'm a firm believer of the law of attraction, thus I have faith in having a good thinking to attract good things coming to my life. Recently heard this from work 'We are prime to things that fit into our theory' and it helps to re-assure my belief on our natural tendency to things that we believe are true.

And I... always do my best to keep myself happy under any circumstances. Even if I was to be sad, I try to shorten the period of depression as much as possible. I find ways to execute my negative feelings, either through music, writing, or friends. 

 Friends always say I should study arts instead because I'm just not that scientific, I have way too many emotions to be a scientific person. :) But who knows, I may end up with an artistic job in future, you never know. Our destiny still falls in our hands but not the piece of degree we earn, the stable job we think would lead us to a good life. What's most important is our courage to accept changes.

I guess, that's the reason why I never stop learning other things and keep hearing inspiring stories and thoughts from other people. I want to be passionate about life, not just the small circle I'm currently tied in.

I...love life. :)

I love spending quality time with my favourite person in a quality place.

I love visiting beautiful homes!I keep myself updated with the property prices, while dreaming about the day I own one of these places one day. Optimism  and hard work make me believe that I will lead myself towards a financially secured life without having to move in/out at least once a year. I hope I can establish the sense of security soon.

I love the cheekiness and childishness between baby and I. Oops, that was me trying to apologize to baby because I deleted some of my ugly photos in his phone while he was sleeping.

Hehehehehe.

:) After all, my life is good as it is, and all I wish is another year as good as this. Happy 2014!

Being content is a choice of life, a thought, an attitude

每一天必经的路，也会因为季节的改变，心情的转换和不同的拍摄手法而显得不一样

‘ How can you be so adapted to your life and stay happy when it’s so routine and dull sometimes?’ Black angel asked me at one of our dinner dates after work.

I dare not say I am a person who knows exactly how to live a great life, but I do know the way to see life in a positive way and the importance of staying optimistic with my life at all times. I do feel bored about my job sometimes and frustration creeps in when thinking about the commitment I have to make due to my job. But there is always one thing I keep in mind despite the frustration, I want to make sure that I have the resources available, prepare myself for my dream and kick start it when the time is right. To be an achiever in life, I have to first load my bullets before going all out for the achievements I wish to accomplish at the later stage of my life. I need some time to settle my thoughts, some experiences to learn about the appropriate ways of being a good entrepreneur, as well as financial support for my living expenses and future business modal. With that in mind, it is easier for me to accept my current routine and be content with the way I lead my life now because I’m gaining something out of it, this means that I’m carrying my life in a manner that is much more than just doing-the-same-thing-every-day kind of life.

Of course, that doesn’t mean that I do not like freedom and leisure. I love travelling to explore different places leisurely and I never restrict myself from splurging in this area. I’m just spreading my hobby over a long span of time to keep a balance among work, loved ones, and hobby instead of pursuing my hobby all at once and taking a long time off for travelling. By doing this, my work allows me to support my hobby, and my hobby allows me to keep motivated and energetic for my job, so they must co-exist and this relationship will balance out itself wonderfully. By doing this, I know I will not regret because I still follow my heart and never restrict myself to only 1 thing at a time. Maintaining the balance is very characteristic of my personality and it matters to me, especially when I have people that I really love and care of, so much that I am willing to find a way to work things out for our happiness, both me and them. It doesn’t mean that I can’t be happy even though I only travel few times in a year because of work, I am still grateful because I can travel with people that I love and escape from the busy world together. I don’t think it’s a sacrifice of my personal will because I gain things from the other end.

To me, it’s always about the thought which will change into thing. Our perception about life affects our happiness and attitude to make things happen. It is okay if you feel that life is dull because it’s not at the best stage yet, but you can’t deny the little bits of awesomeness in it right?  

不是甘于平凡不懂得制造生命的花火，而是刺激也是需要平凡的造就才能衬托出它的不同。

That’s a choice, a thought, an attitude. There is always a choice, and there is always a way to work things out.  My 5 years of independent life makes me a buyer for the saying ‘When there is a way, there is a will’. 

5 things that make me a happy bee 2

 I gain positive energy when I'm constantly reminded on the little things which make my day so peaceful yet blissful. :) It's not hard at all to find things that will lift up my mood every day, simply because there are just so many events taking place in every second, every minute, and every hour. Thus, I decided to make positive writing as a habit and share the happiness around.

July had been a great month, both leisurely and academically. I tried to manage my leisure time wisely to make sure that I did not rot at home for some meaningless activities only. It's always about achieving the balance between soul and body to me, and this appears to be a continuous learning process in my life.

1. We revisited Deep Cove to picnic with friends in mid July. Learning from the last lesson, we decided to bus this time to eliminate the possibility of not getting a parking space. Deep Cove is my new favourite because it is spacious, less crowded, and it gathers all sorts of outdoor activities in one place (hiking, picnic, kayak/paddleboard, sightseing)

Highlight of the day fell on the 4 brave girls who took up the challenge to hike for 2 hours with sandals. It was absolutely unintended but hiking was a spontaneous idea we came up with upon arrival, and we didn't want to let go the chance of hiking the Baden Powell Trail. So there you go, challenge accepted!

I had to say, it was crazy but quite fun at the same time, because we saw some people doing the same thing along our journey. But I felt worth it after watching the view on top. It was simply spectacular and breath taking.

  Feels so good getting close to the Mother Nature once in a while.

2. Shopping for cheap deals has always been my hobby because I'm not a branded person. I prefer getting various clothing styles for the same price.

 I can't keep things to myself when it comes to getting cheap deals,  feel lacking for not sharing my achievement :P

I was doing minor shopping for my Hawaii trip today because I was short of sandals. Every time when it comes to buying accessories, Adrene is my first place to go because of its price, wide variety and sizes along with acceptable product quality. I knew this place wouldn't disappoint me, got 2 sandals and 1 beach bag for $15. No Frills should consider sharing its motto with Adrene. Seriously, such a price can't be beat, even for online shopping!

2 phone cases for $8, thanks to ebay! 

3. Apart for all the social activities, I didn't forget to fork out some time for beneficial thing. Company sent me to first aid training last Saturday. It was an 8-hour course, primarily teaching basic skills to help an injured person at first hand. 

I used to join Red Crescent Society when I was in high school, and attending this course kinda made me reminiscing those time when my friends and I would go for extra-curricular activities on Saturday to learn all sort of first aid skills, let alone the nasty marching session under the uber UV-poisonous sun lol. Can't believe that was 7 years ago! T_T

 

4. Went back to UBC for paid studies, and I took this opportunity walking around my former school to witness the changes since I left school. So my tuition fee was spent on a new fountain, student union building 2 and other endless constructions. Nowonder I heard a new motto coined to UBC- 'a place of construction' instead of 'a place of mind'. Based on my observation, it can't be a false statement at all lol.

Anyway, July is the rose-blossoming season :), as you can see in the pictures already. Although I'm not fond of flowers, seeing the garden being coated with multi colours still lifts up my mood.

5.  July was also the month of catching up with good friends and chit chat till the end of the day :). I'm glad we took advantage of the good weather and spent some time at the beach, since I didn't really get to step foot on the beach this summer. 

Lovely Xin also brought me to a new cafe- Panda Cafe, which incorporates reading manga and eating in one place. Food was average there, but the quiet atmosphere and private rooms catered for individual gatherings made up for it. :) Definitely a good chit-chatting place and an ideal hangout place for Otaku.

With the end of July, I shall welcome the eighth month of 2013 in a slightly exciting tone :) Hawaii, I'm coming!!!

Plans for May

It’s the time of the year again for our BFF reunion. Seeing them brings me an indescribable sense of comfort and security, that’s simply because they know me much better than myself, I daresay. Being the last Summer break for most of us as a Student, I think this summer is going to be extremely precious to us since it’s the last time we can enjoy all the student privileges.

Cost of graduation= no discounted movie tickets and karaoke

This summer is also my busiest break with so many plans ahead of me, but I’m definitely enjoying it delightfully because I know I would have accomplished much after the break, knowledge and experience wise. This is my plan for May:

1. Diet.
Oh my god, my life has always been in a dilemma! People either say that I’m quite skinny or I’m fat. As much as I’m confused with the contrast, what upsets me the most is hearing the remark of me looking bigger-sized than a guy, when I consider myself a distance away from 'big sized'. Anyway, criticisms are only going to make me better, and I won't wait for another inflow of criticisms to come. So,I will lose some weight healthily until I don’t hear anything negative about my size anymore. Diet go go go!

2. Hangul.
I can read most of the words for now, thus I’m working on the vocabulary and sentence structures by watching online videos. I’ve a competition with Xin on our Hangul proficiency at the end of the break, and I've faith in myself to do well when I’m very determined to pull off something. I decided to self-learn make it more challenging, so please stay tuned my rival!
=P Good luck on your summer Korean class too!

3. Music composition.
It’s just a continuation on what I’ve been doing for a few months now. I’m also learning to play piano without music sheets to train my ears. I believe that mastering this skill will enhance my music composition to make them sound more vibrant and smooth. Wish me luck, peeps!

4. Nihon-go
Although I’m focusing more on Hangul now, it doesn’t mean that I neglect Japanese completely since my goal is to master both languages in 5 years time. So, I’m revising my past textbooks nowadays and planning to take the JLPT before going on to the next level. I once told a friend that I can expand my career opportunities in Asia with the 7 languages I’ll soon master, since I’ve always wished to work in different countries in future as a way to travel to different parts of the world. Of course, I understand that opportunities do not drop by without efforts being made, so I’m equipping myself from time to time to make myself a better rival to the others.

Keeping myself busy is the most efficient way to keep me motivated and make good use of the break time. After learning a bit about emotion management, I realized spending my time with worthy people always brings the best out of me and makes me feel calm. That's what matters to me at this stage of life.

Live life, love life, then only can I bring myself to my dreams.

P/S: Photography by PY, arigatou!

力量

一直都不喜欢觉得自己可怜，当我还有帮助别人的能力，

一直都习惯收起坏脾气，生气别人让我难以原谅自己，

一直都在坦然地面对真相，真相是带我走向明天的伯乐，

一直都不相信永远，当我还活在会老化的躯体，

一直都勇于面对选择，选择让我相信自己的决定，

一直都勇于承担悲伤，悲伤会幻化为成长的泪滴，

一直都习惯接受决定，没有比接受更难熬的关口，

一直都习惯为别人着想，忘了自己也很重要，

如果有一天，我觉得自己可怜，自暴自弃，活在过去, 害怕清醒，身心疲惫，忘记微笑，

如果有那么的一天，请掴醒我，然后拍拍我的肩膀，
告诉我：没关系，最难熬的都已经过去了，你现在还好好地活着。

我相信，我会一直记得那一巴的力量，然后很积极地生活，为了自己。

我相信，我不会再输给自己，屈服于现实的幻影。

2010 is the year (2)

2010 is the year Vancouver hosted Winter Olympics.

I saw the transformation of Vancouver, from a peaceful and relaxing place into a vibrant and merry city with tons of visitors hustling in and out of Downtown. I was excited with the variety changes happening in the city, but there was also another side of me who wished to bring Vancouver back to its origin. I don’t need a Times Square in here, all I need is just a less-crowded Stanley park, a place for real breeze of mind.To me, peace and nature are still 2 elements which bring out the beauty of Vancouver.

Feb 2010, you gotta be here. I'm glad that I did.

Beautiful art

Take 12 minutes to watch this video.



This video is a very good metaphor about life. Sometimes, life is just like the stack of cubes as shown in the video, every cube represents a different phase in life, and every cube anchors to another cube of memory.

これわ人生です

My umbrella, ella ella ella

Changing at least one umbrella per year is definitely not a joke in my life, as my umbrella seems to have this love-hate relationship with me. It’s either she gives up her life and stops servicing me, or she leaves me to another place.

Yar, so my second umbrella of the year disappears from my life again and for the first time, the mistake was caused by me. I left it under my chair after the break.The thing is, I didn’t even buy the umbrella itself since the umbrella was given by my friend who left my previous umbrella on the train, which seems to be so sarcastic now, because that just shows how dim my fate with umbrella is.

It’s now the time for my third umbrella this year, I sincerely hope that we will love each other more and spend longer time together this time.

Thank you for attending the events of my heart.

Past few weeks seemed like a nightmare to me as a string of unfortunate events happened to me, from eating disorder, diarrhea, weird mouse clicking sound, bee sting, till now… dad’s illness. Unfortunate things were lining up for me one after another immediately after I thought I got through a big one. I thought it was going to be a good new start on my way back to Vancouver, but looks like it’s just another journey towards another battle.

Perhaps we humans are constantly battling within ourselves journey after journey, we open the door, venture for a while, then we close the door and hop on to the next door and repeat the cycle again. Maybe, this is what we call as moving on.



Really, this is what I’ve felt last week when my limit is pushed to a higher level and I couldn’t withstand the uneasiness in life. I feel a different level of pain so close to me that it doesn’t tear my heart into pieces, but I’m stunned for a few days without knowing what to do to keep my tears from falling down. It just intrudes my heart and strangles every of my nerves before I can further react on it.



However, I understand something about friendship courtesy to these unfortunates in my life. Some little angels came to me with their warm hearts to light me up. Although they tease me and megabomb me, only I can feel the humour within it and the act of care. To me, teasing me consistently works way better than bringing me out on a treat or talking sweet to me occasionally. They remind me that we’re here to complement each other, for fun and for bun, for pain and for gain. That’s just how our friendships work.

“True friends will come to you naturally, you don’t really have to look for them. They will present if they want to.”

Thank you for the porridge, that’s the sweetest thing on earth for an eating disorder person.

Thank you for the medicine and suggestions, that’s the most practical way to get rid of diarrhea.

Thank you for all the physical and verbal hugs, these are my definitions of love and care.

Thank you for making fun of me just to make me laugh.

Thank you for the accompaniment,that’s the greatest thing in between words of silence.

I may not be in the right position now but I will get back to track soon.

Be optimistic, be tough, believe, and I will begin to see the miracle.

A bad start

This has got to be the worst start of my academic year.

I never understand the pain of eating disorder until recently when I can’t even have a proper meal as my tummy feels bloated and gassy after consuming a little bit of food. Literally, I’m excreting 80% of what’s going into my stomach everyday in a bad form. To make matter worse, I’m still not fully recovering from jet lagging yet and so I’m kind of sleep deprived for the whole week. I finally understand the pain of not being able to eat rice, noodles or any starchy food at all which used to taste so delicious to me.

I don’t know what’s happening to me as I thought it would be pretty easy for me to cope with jet lagging after spending 2 years here.I really dislike my current lifestyle and I’m doing everything I can to regain the balance in both my sleeping time and diet. I can’t afford to see how these important elements in life taking their tolls on my studies later on.

I just want to be myself again, a person who feels satisfied after finishing a meal and getting enough sleep. Eating disorder has never ever happened to me before and therefore I’ve no clue on how to solve it.

Help me and give me some suggestions please!

A good change

Someone told me an interesting fact last time, she said people generally change when they fall in love. Well, I think that’s reasonable since you’re not alone now, you can’t act impulsively based on your preference purely. So then you have to cater the need of your partner and crack your head to please them.



I’ve witnessed this phenomenon indeed; I’ve seen how my friends change over the time after starting a relationship. I don’t meet up with them as often, mailbox seems to be rather quiet, friends forget their promises occasionally and you see your name appears lesser and lesser on their blog. Then you start questioning yourself, is it your friends who change or is it you who stays the same?

I’m not sure but I just see how friendship starts to fade out a little when a new relationship creeps in. Because nothing stays the same forever, friendship itself will go through several stages as we grow older. We used to spend a lot of time together with our peeps last time, that’s how we define intimacy and a friendship’s strength. However, as time passes by, we may be occupied with other things and our time commitment for each other starts to go on a downhill. Then it gets worse when we start dating and be in a relationship. Just admit it, friends won’t think of you as much as they did before when they have boy/girlfriend and even if they told you that they never change, you know they’re just trying their best to lie to you.



You know they’ve changed when they don’t do what they have done for you in the past. You know when the first few things they tell you is always about their boy/girlfriend, and it makes you feel as if you’ve known their boy/girlfriend for a very long time after every conversation. When you update them about your life, they suddenly feel guilty and apologize.They say, “I’m sorry for being such a bad friend, I never care enough for you”.

Meanwhile, I also understand that if a relationship can’t change a person towards a more loving and caring one, then that is actually a failure. To be a loving and caring person, time spent on each other is the golden key.But that doesn’t mean that we can’t keep up with our friends, it’s just that we’ve changed another way to keep in touch with them. We don’t spend as much time together anymore, but a ‘take care’ or 'miss you' simply means more than anything else. A friendship’s strength is not measured by the time commitment we have for each other, but it’s measured by the love and blessings we have for them in times of separation. It’s not about the sadness which arises when we haven’t been talking for months, it’s about the excitement I feel when they update me occasionally.



Yeap, adjusting your schedule and lifestyle is just a must-change thing in life, so there’s nothing much for you guys to feel bad about, because I know at some point in my life, my friends will have their own lives to be busy with, and also a more important person for them to take care of.At this time,my responsibility as a friend is to compromise with the lack of updates and time spent with them.Also, I'm supposed to give them my full blessings and.... learn more about their boy/girlfriends through our conversations probably.

Don’t have to comfort me by saying that you won’t change, because changing your attitudes when you are in a relationship can be positive. It may turn you from hot-tempered to patient, from impulsive to careful, from a self-centered person to a considerate person.

If I can understand the reason for your sudden change, then you don’t have to deny it at all, since it may be a good thing.



And one day, when you suddenly think of me, just remember that I’m always at the point where I’m staying all the time, watching and haunting you guys, hohohoho!

Results

Are results important in your life?

I used to think that having a good result in everything I do is the only indicator to the success in my life. But now, I've a new perspective on the successes in my life.

Process is important to me nowadays, I’m taught in a way that if I learnt something along the way towards a goal, then it’s not considered a failure even if I failed to accomplish the goal in the end. It’s not that results are no longer vital to me anymore, but it’s no longer the sole indicator which determines my success.

I don’t think I’ve lost something completely even if I did not get the desired outcome in the end. The further I walk along the route, the more I understand about myself and the things that I’ve gained. I just forgo the desired outcome for something else, so it’s the price I’m willing to pay for it.

If I’m willing to pay for the lesson, then it’s no longer a loss anymore.
只要我学会笑着走到最后，那就是一种胜利。

On a side note,today is 16th April:
• I’ll stop procrastinating and work hard for Physics final on the 20th.
• I had Barbecue in Japanese style with my buddies at Zakkushi .*thumbs up*
• Wayne just got me an Olympic Coke Zero bottle. ^.^
*I really agree with Isis that Wayne you’re the best, wa wa wa wa!*
• I told myself that I’m good for 3 times.
• I found a guy who has the same birthday as me,woot!



Looks like today is another great day of mine.

Songs to inspire the many.

如果你快乐 再不是为我
会不会放手 其实才是拥有
知足的快乐叫我忍受心痛

You always encourage me to be optimistic in life, keep the right attitude to do things right. This time, I hope that you can work hard and persevere till the end. I know how it feels to not share the happiness with the same person again, from being the closest person to a stranger. But I also acknowledge your effort, you have done your best.Since it’s the best, then the memories should also be the best.Cheer up, my friend.*Pat pat*

Last time, Jay Chou’s “晴天” accompanied me for 2 years.

This year, I changed to another theme song. It’s not because of the beginning of a new story,but I think I need some new blood on my iTunes song list, also a new blood in me.



我沒有哭　也沒有笑　因為這是夢

Maybe I still don't understand the reason now, but I know that I will be alright one day.

ただ 、ありがとう

The past few days were productive and peaceful, as I diverted my usual MSN chatting time to do something else. Other than attending lectures, I spent most of the time on my own and I did whatever that kept me busy and made me feel good,like homework time, beach walk+sunset, walking, music, as well as dramas and movies. I realized I can do a lot of things aside from the regular lecture hours.

At this age, at this time of life, everyone will be busy chasing their dreams or simply to live a life. One day, there’ll be an end for every little thing, but never forget the fact that it’s those little happenings which make our life so spectacular (saw this from someone’s FB status). At least, I’m glad that these things happen on me as they walk me to every different stage. Then, I will learn to let go with a smile on my face, if it’s a must and it’s for the better. I know it’s not anyone’s fault, maybe falling down is just a process of growing up, to remind us that whatever that doesn’t kill us will only make us stronger. Perhaps we know that it’s for the better and there’s no other solution to the problem.

And it’s not really about me, it’s about you.

“ただ ありがとうを 伝えたくて
ただ　君の笑顔を 見たくて
ありがとう　君と出会えて”

-“ただありがとう” Monkey Majik-

Thought a lot in these few days, fortunately the conclusion is positive. I'm really sorry for having you guys worried about me for my previous post, but I will be alright. I really will, just give me some time to accumulate the courage to stay cheerful.

20 Cents Theory

Few days ago I talked to Lawrence and he randomly tested me on his 20 cents theory:

Law: What will a girl do if a guy only had 20 cents?
Me:Ehh, why?
Law:
If the girl took all the 20 cents, that means the girl loves herself more than she loves the guy.
If the girl shared with the guy and each gets 10 cent, that means she's really looking into their future, and she's willing to work hard together for it.
If the girl gave all the money to the guy, that means she loves the guy more than he loves her.
Me:What if the girl gave the guy extra 20 cents?
Law:That means...the girl is rich.
Me: Lol.
Law: Jk.That case then the guy will be very touched and will work even harder to repay the girl for what she has sacrificed for him,to make her feel that he's worth it.

That's the funny future lawyer's set of 20 cents theory, I LOL-ed twice because I knew he made it up. That's just so his style because he loves crapping. The more you know him, the more you understand his bird language.

Being distant for 7942 miles, 16 hours of time difference, 8 months of not seeing each other yearly, it's so amazing that he's always there when I need a pair of ears. He's like my second brother, teaching me his bird language and his ways to distinguish a good guy and a bad guy.Most of the time,he also shares with me his lame jokes and basically everything that we can think about.

People who don't know him good enough will think that he's always playful and sarcastic. Some girls even find it annoying because he criticizes them quite often.However, I really appreciate his honesty and care although his sarcasm can never change. At least he bothers to tell me things straight off without giving me face at all, instead of lying to me.His honesty and care are what I find valuable in our friendship.

He's definitely one of the very important guy friends (V.I.G) in my life.Bear bear young tops the ranking, Law will definitely be the second. With them, I've more than enough reasons to be content with my life.

It takes time to open up the door again

Just yesterday, Susie told me a heart-breaking accident which happened on her friend and the girl’s boyfriend. Frankly, it was not the first time I heard such an ordeal happened to people around me.Having said that, my emotions will still be affected everytime I hear something like this. It’s always painful to hear, or see people leaving us, knowing that they have stepped on a path for eternity, towards a place which is beyond our reach.

Perhaps the only way we can keep them with us is to bond the tie within two hearts, to remember and believe that they will never step out of our heart. Then we move on to our life, with the belief that they’re still watching over us. Maybe, their mission on earth is completed, and now they have another mission and responsibility to complete in an eternal world.Maybe,they mean more than what they are.

Deep down inside, we still miss them, but the world has never stopped for us to reminiscent, not even a second. We know, we still have life to continue. We know, we still have to rebound and get up one day. One day, we still have to open up the door and welcome the outside world again.

We know, that human limits can be explosive. We can do better than we thought if we release the time bomb in us. Therefore, for what our parents have given us, we shall live the most out of it. Since everything happens for a reason, things may not match with our desires and goals at first, but we’ll eventually understand the ultimate reason one day.

What we’re really waiting for is the arrival of that day.

What we’re really battling against is time.

Why white hair and insomnia?

These 2 things upset me.

Why would I roll on the bed for 3 hours few days ago, because I drank milk tea at night. >_<

I saw the first ever strip of white hair on my head last week, and why is this happening? >_<

I don’t know why. But I’m already 21 years old, I’m not a kid anymore, it’s not like you give me a cotton candy and I will stay happy for the whole day.

I want to be honest to myself this time.
I don’t want to smile and pretend that I’m good all the time.
I feel like running non-stop until I’m tired and then get a good sleep.
I want to squad down and laugh in the middle of the road as though I’m constipated.

Tell me, this is not me. Because I thought my life was very organized.


Tell me, this is just a phase that I need to walk through. So, give me some time to figure out the problems and handle them properly.

So white hair don’t grow anymore, ok?

迟来的‘喜讯’

前几天，大小老公一起见面，聊起了我们的关系。

刘伟泥说是时候给彼此一个名分，所以呢，她就说要在Facebook公告天下，这样就不怕大家出轨啦（显然不是我先出轨，lol）。所以呢，我们‘结了婚’大约5-6年后，终于正式公告天下了。

她应该是担心我一个人会寂寞，所以就打算要把快乐感染给我。老公很称职，甚至介绍了保镖--男友头号给我认识，跟我通风报信，偶尔提醒我要早睡觉，一个人在外地要好好照顾自己。其实，她也很了解我的性格，我一定能照顾好自己滴。

很多人无法了解我们的关系。我想，没跟我们一起走过的人还真的无法看透当中酸甜苦辣的回忆。还记得来之前，她写了满满一本日记簿送给我，里头的每一页都记载着我们从相识，相知，到互相扶持的旅程。原来，已经过了8年了。我在加拿大的第一年，老公过年过节，甚至是友谊週，情人节都会寄D.I.Y卡片给我，为我送上最热腾腾的佳节气息。到了第二年，老公心里住了多一个人，虽然卡片少了，但她的关心也不曾少过，她说会一直提醒我她的优点，我想，你才该感谢我的衷心吧=P。

之前心情不好，老公及时送上最温暖的安慰。她什么也没问，只是说了句：“我一定会支持你的”
我想，如果你在我身边就好了，有个肩膀可以靠。

之后，老公动了手术，要在家休息一阵子，无法表演令她深感遗憾。
我知道她很沮丧，可是也同时也希望她不要停止期待下次表演的机会。

刘伟泥铁人，
我把我5 分耐力借给你，我相信你有朝一日表演会用到它的。
我把我4分好运送给你，我相信铁人跟超人会一直幸福快乐下去。
我把我3分快乐分你，那你难过的时候还有储存起来的快乐可以备用。
我把我2分关心给你，因为我知道有人会给予超标的关心，所以2分就够了。
我把1份好消息送你，就是不用担心我，我没事，我没事，我没事。

她怕我不开心，就寄了2封很有意思的emails鼓励我，并祝福我找到一位好人。我想，我应该遇到了吧，不然也不会嫁给她了。看来被肯定的感觉很好，感觉到‘地位’不受威胁。

谢谢你一直以来的支持与信任。接下来的日子，我们要一起努力!

When I look back into 2009 Part 1

I turned 20 in October of 2009. I think it was a significant milestone to me, because it wasn’t merely just a change in figure, but more about realization and mental change. When I look back on what I have done in these few years, I couldn’t help but to be amazed on how far I’ve walked. I’m not longer the one I was earlier, who would stand and wait for miracles, I believe in doing what I can and see how far I can go. And I did, accomplished things that I’ve never thought of doing, like conquering Acrophobia, seeing cherry blossom for the first time, and celebrating CNY outside. There’s so much more that happened and made my life exuberant and busy.

2009-a year of growing up and to be more matured, I’m grateful with the chosen path.
2010- Continue walking towards my goals, be rational, forgive and let go, stay happy and healthy.

Nothing is going to stop me until I reach my goals.



2009 was a holiyear for me. I travelled quite often last year and set foot on 5 countries (Canada, Malaysia,Thailand, Singapore, United States) in a year, I feel that I’ll never get tired in exploring new places and new faces. All trips were equally distributed among family, friends, and also myself, and it’s always a joy to go on a vacation with them because that’s when all the fun begin.

I enjoy travelling as much as I enjoy music, because seeing things with my own eyes are totally different from the spectacular views seen in pictures. Despite of how amazed I feel at those pictures, it’s still my feelings drive me to my thoughts and memories.

Everytime when I visit a new place, I’ll tell myself :

“Congratulations, you did it again.”

I think this is a form of liberation from all the stress and difficulties, and also an encouragement to myself to be courageous for the following challenges.
More more trips in 2010? Let’s see.


Dad turned 60 in September, a week after I left home. We all had a pre-birthday lunch with the relatives few weeks before his birthday, so that I was there for his birthday. I could never forget that day, because I’ve never missed my parents’ birthday celebration since I was born, including the year of 2008 when mom and dad came to Vancouver to visit me.

The day will still come regardless of how reluctant we are to face the reality, aging is a part of the life cycle. As much as I hope that dad and mom will always be by my side and pamper me like a little baby, there’ll definitely be one day when I have to pick up the responsibility and switch role with them.

Dad, I’m always proud of you, and will always be. I think, my biggest guilt for you is that I can’t help you out in your business, and continue to let it glow like how you started the spark.



After mentally preparing myself for 8 months, I met up with him finally.The way we communicated with each other was the same as last time, still the casual talk and lame jokes.Fortunately, nothing really changes even after so many incidents, and we're still able to remain our friendship. I really appreciate him as the one, as a good friend, and also as a sweet guy in the gang. Perhaps I still value his happiness a lot, that’s why I chose to give him the best blessing that I could offer.

Deep down my heart,I want to thank him because a lot of my gains in Vancouver derived from him. If I did not make the choice at that time, I will not receive and learn as much as I do now. Although sometimes when I look back, I'll think

'What if I took the first step at that very moment?' or
'What if he told me earlier, will things change?'

No. There's no if, there's no looking back. There's no us anymore.

He makes me realize that I can go on alone when I’m determined. I still remember that
I cried on the plane when I first left home, because it was a difficult choice for me.It meant a new start with no foundation at all, I had to push myself forward to live independently in a whole new world.But I carried on with him as my pillar strength and motivation,and made my life as busy as possible. There's nothing for me to forget, because memories are memories, once they are stored, they'll remain. What I needed to do was to learn a way of living a happier life, until I could become everyone's B again.

All tears sprinkled into smiles after 1.5 years, when I did my best to live life happily, when I can fully understand that love is not just about possession but a blessing. There’s no right or wrong, just that I’m not the one, and will never be. But I’m still happy for the fact that he appeared in my life, maybe the reason for his appearance is to tell me that some relationships remain best as friendships, just like me and him.

2009- Time to let go.
2010- Time to love myself more.

-To be continued-

This is a hard time for me.

I was re- arranging my photos the other day, and I found out the difference between my previous look and recent look.I felt like I went through a transformation because my face used to be so chubby at the beginning of 2009, and it took less than a year to lose that baby fats naturally. I think my face has never been this slim before ;the V-shape is so obvious when I smile nowadays.

NOOO.

I swear that fat loss was unintended, because I did not tie my stomach tight to slim my face.I have long accepted the fact that my face was chubby and it could hardly be changed. Thanks to the hectic workload and never-ending essay assignments, I accomplished something that I could barely achieve when I attempted to- slim face. And I’m definitely not exaggerating when I say my face is the first body part that shows the extra fats when I gain weight, now you get what I mean.

But, but, but…..

I’m not feeling very happy either. I started to understand how Eileen feels when she says she is losing weight even though she carries out a regular diet, because that is what happening to me now. But again, lacking of sleep is devastating, and what I eat can’t even compensate with the loss of sleep. If you asked me how horrible this term is, that's how it goes:

-Staying outside for more than 12 hours for lectures, group meetings, labs and tutorials. Going back home at 11 or 12 a.m is not impossible.

- Weekends are not meant to be slacking time anymore.3-4 hours of group meetings on Sunday is very common.

- Waking up at 5 or 6 a.m to study or finish assignments is not impossible, when you have 25 essays to write in 13 weeks.

-Having 2 midterms on the same day is very common, and the best way for me is to skip class on that day to squeeze out some studying time.

- Skipping lunch or dinner is not impossible, because sometimes I hit the sack right away after reaching home.





I went through another transition stage; from grumbling a lot on the workload, till I do everything quietly and automatically because I don’t know what should I say about it anymore. Because I’m running out of time, I’d rather save most of the energy as an input to produce more works.

There was once when I was sobbing while talking to Atlee gg about my group mates who left me with almost the entire project to complete with.When I found out, I had to finish the draft 2 hours before the due date on my own, and only one of the guys helped me on the latter part. There was another time when tears fell down quietly while I was doing my English essay at 5 morning, grasping the advices my English professor gave me. Stress is far beyond the word to describe my life.

But again, they taught me on the cruelty of life, if you’re not good enough, you’ll be knocked out. I accepted the cruelty, but that doesn’t mean that I won’t strive hard to survive in university. I will cry, but that also means that I will rebound after that.It is just another fall which will be followed by a rise. So, don’t worry about me, I’m not a walking skeleton, my weight has not dropped to 30+, and I still get a few hours of sleep every day.

See, I still have time to blog for you guys !

Of course, this is a hard time for me,but it will be over after final exams. Let’s pray for my last battle,I thank you in advance.