Don't worry about me because I love my life.

After meeting up with most of my friends,I think, my friends are really worried about my love life.

这就是所谓的'皇帝不急太监急'.

I thought my post on 'love youself more' pretty much explains my current perception on relationships. But friends are even more worried after reading it.

You know what they do? They start observing the guys around me and telling me which one to be considered.They've also taught me the ways to get a good guy back in Canada.

They're feeding me with a lot of good words to boost my confidence. To me,it's no longer a matter of confidence, it's the willingness to step into it. Overall,most of the guys are getting worse and worse, so far I've seen, not about appearance, not about personality, but some of them don't treat relationship like a thing, because ' it's not like I'm going to marry with her' and ' I'm still young, it's ok even if I break up with her'. I'm overdosed on all these thoughts that they no longer sound wrong to me.In fact, these are not wrong but my thought mismatches them. So, some people in the game behave flirtatiously, with or without a partner, that I sometimes will start wondering, why do they need one if they always change ? I have no right at all to influence their attitudes, so I manipulate mine by avoiding the participation.

Some people are looking for one desperately, they feel extremely discontented with their lives without a boyfriend. Now I don't get this idea, why can't you live a good life without a boyfriend? Is your life attached to him that you can't find a life for yourself? And then they start saying things like ' Pui Mun, I hope I can be as tough as you, living happily even when you're alone at overseas.' I can assure you that you can be happy regardless of the place, it's the mental condition that is important.

I'm not saying having a boyfriend is disastrous and meant hurt and lies only, but I'm not ready for a commitment, there's no one that I think worth my commitment at the moment. Also, I can't take the stress and depression after a fight or conflict.To me,it's never a poor thing to not have a boyfriend to treasure me,and it's never bad to stay single. Everything needs a cost, and I'm paying it of course. I don't date on Valentines, receive flowers at my doorstep, but I get more free time to do my own things.

I think you make the choice of staying happy or venture into the love world that makes people blind easily. I mean, you can't mourn for the same tragedy that has happened to you forever, you need to carry on with your life no matter how, and if that's so, why not find a good way to continue it? Why must you be so stubborn over someone who doesn't love you that much and waste your time?When the time comes, the right one will come to you. If not, you still have to get a life, right?

Your life never abandones you, although he does.

So buddies, don't worry too much about me. You know I won't cry because of not having a boyfriend and I don't find one desperately.But if you are still worried, then pray for me to meet a good one in Canada, be it an Angmoh, Korean, Japanese or Taiwanese. With or without one, I'm still satisfied with my life, accomplishment and myself.

One night sit in Hong Kong airport

The night before I reached K.L, I spent 13 hours in the Hong Kong international airport because my connecting flight departed on the next day. Looking at the time I reached the airport and the amount of luggages I was carrying, having a brief city trip was a bad idea although my previous visit on this oriental land exceeded 10 years, far before the existence of Hong Kong Disneyland and Star Walk.

Erhmm erhmm. So there comes my first experience of sleeping overnight in the airport.

Prior to this, I had a little mind mapping on the possible things I could do there, like sticking myself to the laptop at a coffee shop, or simply buying a magazine and start up some reading. Well well, it was my bad neglecting the tiny little things which turned out to be so important that they ruined my plan to nowhere. I had no problem spending the first 2 hours with my laptop and re-packing my luggage, till my laptop was exhausted and there the ordeal began. I totally forgot about the converter since my laptop charger couldn’t fit in the plug. I then tried to look for a converter to solve the problem but I failed.

Empty

So my laptop passed out that day, and my MP3 took up the responsibility to accompany me. I spent another few hours by having my meal, MP3-ing,writing diary, talking to my mom, playing with my phone and then watching people passing by desperately. To me, it was really one of those helpless moments in life.

Empty

There’s always the bright side opposing the dark one. Because of the loneliness, I threw myself some time to go into deeper thinking, which was totally uninterrupted. When the lights were turned off one by one ,slowly and inactively, I started rewinding my mind to look back at things I wished I could have thought of a solution.

Empty

Looking at myself, I’ve already passed the age to do things rebelliously and can still blame on my adolescence. I’ve already lost some opportunities to work on things I wished I could have done it at that very significant moment.Despite of all these failures in life, I’ve reached this far and accomplished more, especially on those things I would never expect myself to have the courage to begin with. I believe in sacrificing part of my life to fix a bigger part of my life, just like everything needs an opportunity cost in the world of economics, when balance isn’t the best way to harmonize life. The thing is, I have to accept my life for what I’ve been given, accept every decision made by myself and the others who tend to influence my life. Because I don’t live alone,and my life is chained to someone else. Because I only hold half of myself, and let go the other half, to tolerate the intolerable people and things.

Empty

Back to the real world, people sitting beside me kept on changing, until there were few left.We were sitting in the same boat,I could see that they were dying for their next flight as well, just like the pathetic me . Then I entertained myself by walking around in the empty airport when all shops were closed.

Empty

It was a special night.Of course,I'm thinking it from the bright side to make me say this. Hey,at least I took some photos of the empty airport to share with some of you whom haven been put into the same shoes. Empty airport can be quite cool to see for a first timer like me. Empty airport wasn't scary itself, but the self-haunting thought made it scary.

What a sleepless night I had !

Sky bar night!

Told you, my night life in K.L can be much more exuberant.

6 of my primary buddies and I headed to Sky Bar for a drink on the 13th May. After living in K.L for so many years without knowing much about this vibrant city, it’s necessary for me to start exploring what’s truly lying around me.

So my K.L explores start from Sky Bar in Traders hotel. Considering that the number of bars I’ve been to is pathetic, I’ve not set up my expectations on how a bar should look like. This bar is slightly different to me because not only the atmosphere is good, the outside view is equally breathtaking. All this while, I’m trying to find a good spot to capture down the Twin tower but I never succeed.Courtesy of this bar,my desire is now fulfilled.


We had our good time there, 120 minutes filled with laughters and camwhores. It was my first time seeing ST blushing and MK had ‘post strawberry haze syndrome’. I myself didn’t feel good after drinking the Strawberry Haze either, only managed to close my eyes in the morning.


It’s not a good drinking place, because there’s a big pool near the walking path, which is approximately an inch from it, I’m afraid drunk people will have trouble walking through it without turning into wet chicken. Otherwise, the pool is a fantastic add-up to the romantic atmosphere.


That night was a good one to me. Perhaps it was because of the right bunch of people around me at the right time to perfect the outing.



What a wonderful night I spent!

Biking adventure

I went to bike 2 days before the finals. The weather was seducing me to come close to the nature, spending a few hours at park.

And I did.

I went to my beloved park-Stanley Park.I rented a bike at the bike rental shop nearby Stanley Park. Before the biking adventure started, I had to overcome my fear on biking since I did not bike for at least 10 years. I was just scared as I could barely balance myself on the bike.



It started to go on smoothly only after a while, when I tried to let go myself and ‘cooperated’ with my bike. It was then that I began to feel the fun of biking around a spacious park under an extremely comfortable weather. I realized biking is a breeze when I fully relax myself.




I cycled around the entire park for once which was about 8-10k.m. It was a cyclical route, so I eventually came back to the starting point after completing one full round of cycling. I was far too excited to notice how far I actually traveled down the route.



That day, I ticked another one off my list. And I went home with a few energizers charged on my back, dated with my textbook all the way till the next morning. Meanwhile, I promise myself to frequent this activity during my stay in Vancouver, it’s such a waste to not bike there given the ideal temperature and place to cycle.

Back Home.

Today’s the fourth day of my return, coming back to the homeland and breathing in the air that I was once familiar with.I can’t tell how blissful I feel to have escaped from the medical check-up and isolation due to the swine flu, and how relieved mom and dad feel for my safe return. I could have been isolated if I decided to stay in Vancouver for just a few more days.

Thank god, I returned safely.

A lot of things are on my mind. Like:

Summer vacation.Summer job.Japanese class.Piano.

This is my weekly schedule.

Household chores.Babysitting.Outings.Piano.Bumping around.

If you think the above is familiar, yes, it is. My life is rewound to a year before, where waiting for tomorrow was my daily thought.

Instead of recharging myself, I’ve the urge to achieve something during this break. It could be grabbing a guitar and start humming it. It could be practicing piano for hours daily; or maybe something simpler, ensuring that I’ve a thorough clean-up for my room before I leave. Many things can be done in these 4 months, and the last option for me would be to sit down and shake legs. That’s not my style.

This summer is going to be a blast for the upcoming series of events that I’m joining.

I really miss the weather in Vancouver.It’s such an irony that I actually enjoy being betrayed by the sun. I like it when the sun is out and the wind is still.

I like how the wind blows my hair to my face.

Like this

I’ve so much to blog actually but more updates will be posted on the following days.

Have a wonderful day friends!